Ryan’s Miracle Watch 4/26/16

Please pray for my family as I am away on business for a few days. Please pray that they will find someone to prepare their food for them, draw their bath water, clean and fold their clothes, cater to their every need and tuck them into bed each night. Oh wait! That’s what we pray for when Janine’s away on business. They’re probably partying the night away with me gone…

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ”Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ”The driver just insulted me!” The man says: ”You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

There was a man who entered a local paper’s pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He slides up to the bar and announces: ”I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.”

I tried water polo but my horse drowned.

Ba dum bum…I needed a good laugh today…

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